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30DBH Day 1 – Cable TV and One Night Stands

April 2, 2012

Day 01 — The one thing that it seems like everyone else on the planet is into but I just cannot stand is…

This question is so hard and that’s not even fair. I started this “project” one day after everyone else I’ve already seen almost all of the posts and I don’t want to do any repeats. I’m already reconsidering my “not posting on the weekends” rule just so I’m not too far behind.

I like to play devil’s advocate almost exclusively, you can probably tell by my comments. You write something and I’ll most likely find a way to support the other side. I also seem to be a fan of making things sooo much harder than they have to be and since I can’t really think of anything I can’t STAND, I’m making it about stuff I just don’t UNDERSTAND the appeal of.

Even then instead of making this post about the first thing that popped into my head (cable television and about how I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY ANYONE WOULD PAY MONEY FOR TV) I’m also going to make it about one night stands because that’s just how we roll here at lifeofcarbon. What would 30DBH be without me actually being 100% honest.

Let’s start with the lighter stuff: cable. I really don’t understand cable. Why do I have to pay to get maybe five channels I actually like along with around forty that are mostly the same shows, but with different titles and slightly different looking actors plus some re-runs of shows that ended in the 90’s. Why can’t I just pay for channels individually? Or even better, why can’t I pay for shows individually? It’s killing me that I won’t be able to watch The Legend of Korra when it comes out, but it’s not worth the price of cable to me. Why should I get all of that excess content when all I really want is one show. Why is that so hard to do? I’d rather wait a year and watch it on Netflix if it’s going to be such a hassle.

Devil’s Advocate Mariana: I understand that some people love to watch sports and the internet has not yet provided an awesome enough solution and so cable is their only option. Then there are people like my “mother-in-law” who love to watch TV and they love the variety that cable provides. They feel that it is a good and entertaining service and the have absolutely no problem paying for it.

Now let’s get down with the honesty. After I totally refuted my first answer I tried to dig deep because that’s what this month is about, isn’t it? Being completely and unabashedly honest with yourself and sharing that part of you with others. So I dug down deep and this is what I came up with:

I really don’t understand the appeal of one night stands. Actually I don’t really understand the appeal of casual sex. Now I should probably get this out of the way: I am still young (19) and so I’m in no way an “expert” in this field. That’s probably why I don’t understand it…

First of all one night stands just seem very scary to me. Why in the world would I want to put myself in such a vulnerable position with a guy I’ve only just met? How in the world can you reach that level of trust with someone in only one night? TV and movies make one night stands out to be exciting, but I can’t imagine feeling anything other than fear and embarrassment.

Same with casual sex. I know we live in a world where sex in general is seen as no big deal and I think that’s a good thing for the most part because consenting adults should be able to do whatever they want as long as no one is getting hurt. That being said, personally I think being that intimate with another person is special and I can’t imagine treating it like you’re just going to the movies or grabbing a bite to eat. That’s just a completely foreign concept to me. Now I know from countless movies and TV shows that sex isn’t always rainbows and butterflies. It isn’t always the most magical thing in the world, but I think that just the fact that you two have that connection should at least MEAN something. Now I know that in a few years or so I might take this back, but that’s life. You live and learn.

This is probably explained by the fact that I’m an extremely monogamous person. I really like that in a world that’s constantly changing and throwing information at me there’s one person who is always there. It’s very comforting to have someone you don’t have to explain things to. Someone who knows you so well that instead of having to keep up appearances or feel like you constantly have to impress them, you can just lay back and be yourself 100%. It just seems like the world is constantly bombarding me with the idea that being in a relationship is the closest thing to death or prison and that I should instead be out partying and getting down with strange dudes. That the fact that I’m still young means I shouldn’t let anyone tie me down and that I should date as many people as possible. But why? It just doesn’t make any sense to me…

*** Please note that I don’t mean anything against people who have had one night stands or who think casual sex is no big deal. I just simply don’t understand it. Feel free to poke fun at my naivety. :3

List of those participating. Not sure how often it’s updated.

24 Comments leave one →
  1. April 2, 2012 12:31 pm

    Wehee! I’m finally the first commenter :p
    I just wanted to say I agree with the one night standers. There’s no point. I read many books about it and they are only caused by a desire to not feel lonely anymore. The problem is – afterwards you will feel more lonely than before!

    • April 2, 2012 5:12 pm

      That’s so true!
      Usually whenever people in real life go through a one night stand they feel bad about it afterwards.
      I just wish that television and movies wouldn’t make them out to be as exciting and as passionate. It just feels like they’re lying.

  2. April 2, 2012 12:35 pm

    Those people who learn to accept one night stands don’t see the physical connection as transcending into the emotional. Maybe they’re trying to rope somebody in by thinking that if they’ll have sex, they’ll be more likely to stay. Maybe they’re just drunk? I don’t know….it’s a difficult question to ask yourself the morning after, when you’re feeling unloved and dirty and disgusted at yourself. When you’re in that position, it’s definitely tough…but maybe the night before there was a certain eroticism to finding an intimate connection with a stranger. Maybe the way you react the morning after allows you to understand yourself better.

    I agree about cable sex though. I watch all my TV on Netflix or Hulu or through websites like sidereel and tv-links!

    • April 2, 2012 5:14 pm

      I understand that some people might find the idea exciting, but I just don’t. It’s so weird how differently people can feel about the same thing.

      Yeah! With hulu and netflix I see no reason to pay for TV! It just doesn’t make any sense. Especially since you can watch Netflix on your TV!

      • April 2, 2012 6:27 pm

        Yeah I know, it’s sad that people still pay out the door for movies and music and tv when there are so many free alternatives (Uh, hello Spotify) Not everybody has to feel the same way about everything, but yeah, it’s fascinating how some people feel so contrary to you on issues.

  3. April 2, 2012 3:55 pm

    First let me say you had me laughing at the first sentence. And since I’ve heard your voice through vlogging, I heard you saying it in your voice – even better. Second thing is, mother-in-law? Explain that one please and then third… I have never liked the idea of casual sex for many reasons. At present one of the top reasons is health and safety. STD are serious business. Of course there are other reasons but I like yours too. I knew Mariana would find a way to put her spin on 30DBH!

    • April 2, 2012 5:08 pm

      I like to say “mother-in-law” just because it’s faster than saying my boyfriend Colin’s mom and because she basically is. I’ve known her so long it’s like she’s my family. :)

      Hahaha. Yes, health class has forever scarred me. I’d be afraid of getting not only herpes, but gonorrhea and crabs all from making out with a sleazy guy. D:

      I’m glad you liked it. This was a pretty fun post to write. :)

  4. April 3, 2012 3:23 am

    I love everything about cable tv. Even though I never touch the sports section, I really enjoy the comedy central and the whole cartoon section…ooh the re-runs too are awesome…

    • April 3, 2012 10:44 am

      I love the stand up on Comedy Central too, there are a few good ones on Netflix. :)
      That is one thing I do miss sometimes. My wallet and conscience just won’t let me. Hahaha.

  5. April 3, 2012 5:04 am

    oh guilty, we have cable TV here all because the shows we watch are not available on the regular channels. however, i do agree with the casual sex views. not a fan either and idc if that makes me sound like a grandmum.

    • April 3, 2012 10:46 am

      That makes sense. There are some shows I’d really want to watch right now that are airing only on cable channels. It’s just easier for me to wait for them to come out. I understand wanting to watch them as they come out though, the suspense and the waiting can make it so much better!

  6. April 3, 2012 5:36 am

    Loved your thoughts Mariana. Sometimes, our age tells how far we’ve gone in life!

  7. April 3, 2012 5:43 am

    I also don’t agree with onc. Just thinking about it makes me feel uncomfortable.

  8. April 3, 2012 9:34 am

    I don’t like one night stands either… it’s just too shallow

  9. April 3, 2012 11:58 am

    I would posit that no one is really into casual sex, even/especially the casual sexer. I’ve never known anyone who engaged in it was in healthy self-awareness with themselves.

  10. April 3, 2012 4:11 pm

    No offense taken haha – I’ve had casual sex before and it’s really nothing I’d want again. I know people who very much think it’s all good for them, and I suppose it has to do with people’s view on sex and intimacy as well as monogamy.

    I for one have never enjoyed myself more than with someone I love, and I mean that in every sense. I love my boyfriend so much, and every moment with him is awesome. Being with a stranger or someone I don’t care much for feels meaningless and I felt numb – so your opinion on the matter is defintiely something I agree with and can relate to.

    As for the being a day behind – dont worry, everyone’s on their own type of schedule too, after Thursday I’ll be a day behind because I had a post scheduled, so there’s no need to worry :).

    Thanks once again for your honesty! (By the way I read 30DBH and at first I thought it was like 30 double H and I thought “gee, that’s a big bra size”…lol I’m strange).

    • April 3, 2012 4:22 pm

      I just feel so behind and I don’t want to just be repeating answers. D:

      PS; The bra comment made me laugh so hard I shot water out of my nose.xD


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